There's something that doesn't fit quite right with me about the whole Facebook's $104 billion flotation, its not just the fact that it will make billionaires out of its creators, the fact that Bono alone will earn up to $900 million is a bit hard to take, all on the backs of people updating their entire lives onto the worlds largest social network site, and don't get me started on the adverts that I don't think anyone ever clicks into. But my problems with Facebook now run a little bit deeper.
Now don't get me wrong I have a Facebook account and unwillingly check it everyday, and the only reason that's stopping me from deleting it is because the University class I am in have a group where throughout the year we have informed each other of when deadlines are due and general study stuff. But that aside Facebook in my opinion is just losing its novelty, where at first it was an innovative and a much more user friendly and sophisticated version of Myspace, now its boring and has got to the stage where it treats its users like products.
As a journalist student what I really like about Twitter is that its not about 'me' its about 'us', its much more about information which is why so many news affiliations find it effective, another of its advantages it requites little effort to use, I use it to post my blogs as well as news gathering. To me it's an extension of the public sphere, it can empower people. Now of course there are a lot of trolls on Twitter and others who use it to show off, much in the same way that people use Facebook to whinge about the every single moment of their life, and others who upload photos of their entire life. Other random irritations include the monumental amount of game requests I get from people who constantly play Farmville and The Sims, I used to play poker quite a bit until I realized how much time suckage it really is.
But underneath facade, when you really think about it the idea of Facebook is a false illusion, whilst it may bring people closer and consistently in reach of one another it also takes away the special qualities of meeting new people and then moving on with your life, in some parts of your life the people who you meet for the briefest moments give you the best experiences and memories. Of course you have the option of picking your friends on Facebook as you do in life, but most people do not.
The same can be said for the photos that users add onto their profile, there really is nothing worse than seeing the latest photo of someones six pack (not that I'm jealous or anything), the dinner they are eating or the latest nail varnish they are using, the list is much bigger but I won't bore you. But the most disheartening thing about uploading meaningful images onto Facebook is the fact that they don't belong there, they belong in a photo album, moments such as weddings, site seeing holidays, special occasions, etc. i'm not saying that sharing is a bad thing, but shouldn't these things be sacred and personal, special memories that you can physically hold in your hand and put in a frame, they should not be shared among a bunch of virtual strangers to peer at.
I admit I am a hypocrite, I have uploaded my New York photos onto Facebook but I would never do so again. But things like Facebook underlines the narcissistic way in which consumer technology is taking over every component of society, as once unnecessary things have gradually become our necessities, and the confusion between pleasure and happiness continues to grow.
Hi I'm Kane Gord, Journalist graduate who writes about stuff, usually entertainment stuff, some random stuff as well
Friday, 18 May 2012
Sunday, 13 May 2012
American Reunion- Review
A decent movie to a series that is perhaps past it’s sell by date
It’s been nearly ten years since American Wedding (2003), and in that time the series has produced numerous straight to DVD spin offs.
Thankfully the new film brings all of the old gang back together for a reunion, this time they’re no longer teenagers but adults in the real world.
The opening scene introduces Jim (Jason Biggs) and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan), who have since had a child together. In typical fashion the opening scene is both cringing and funny in a way we have come to expect from the previous films in the series. Without spoiling much it involves masturbation, on both characters accounts.
We’re soon treated to a short prologue scene for each of the other main characters, Kevin (Thomas Nicholas) has become a become a house husband, Oz (Chris Klein) is now a successful sports show host in Los Angeles, Stiffler (Sean William Scott) is working as a temp in a law firm.
Along with Finch (Eddie Kay Thomas) the old gang are brought together because of a high school reunion in their home town. The film soon brings the characters into awkward situations that we have seen before, namely girls and parties.
Along with the return of Jim’s dad (Eugene Levy), there are a number of funny moments in the film which are reminiscent of the far superior first two films of the series, but they are too far between one another, and whilst they may have once shocked audiences in the past now seem a little forced.
Because the characters are no longer teenagers the crass naivety of each of them is less believable as the writers would have liked. Sub plots such as the bad state of Jim and Michelle’s sex life seem out of place and hamper the pacing of the film.
Other characters from the first three films are now reduced to either slight supporting roles or just cameos, those include Stiffler’s mum, Nadia and Vicky (Tara Reid). Aside from Stiffler’s mum none of the others really much but take up screen time.
The film does have a subtlety and maturity that the others don’t have, and all of the characters come to a satisfying conclusion as the reunion takes place and the final scene follows the end credits, particularly in Stiffler’s case.
But I do hope this will be the last one, with the American box office numbers nowhere near the previous three films this will be more than likely. Perhaps the film would have better served if it had been released on the tenth anniversary of the first film in 2009 instead of 2012.
But American Reunion is still a decent film worth seeing that will divide fans and bring nothing new to newcomers, my message to them, go back to the beginning where it all started.
3/5
It’s been nearly ten years since American Wedding (2003), and in that time the series has produced numerous straight to DVD spin offs.
Thankfully the new film brings all of the old gang back together for a reunion, this time they’re no longer teenagers but adults in the real world.
The opening scene introduces Jim (Jason Biggs) and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan), who have since had a child together. In typical fashion the opening scene is both cringing and funny in a way we have come to expect from the previous films in the series. Without spoiling much it involves masturbation, on both characters accounts.
We’re soon treated to a short prologue scene for each of the other main characters, Kevin (Thomas Nicholas) has become a become a house husband, Oz (Chris Klein) is now a successful sports show host in Los Angeles, Stiffler (Sean William Scott) is working as a temp in a law firm.
Along with Finch (Eddie Kay Thomas) the old gang are brought together because of a high school reunion in their home town. The film soon brings the characters into awkward situations that we have seen before, namely girls and parties.
Along with the return of Jim’s dad (Eugene Levy), there are a number of funny moments in the film which are reminiscent of the far superior first two films of the series, but they are too far between one another, and whilst they may have once shocked audiences in the past now seem a little forced.
Because the characters are no longer teenagers the crass naivety of each of them is less believable as the writers would have liked. Sub plots such as the bad state of Jim and Michelle’s sex life seem out of place and hamper the pacing of the film.
Other characters from the first three films are now reduced to either slight supporting roles or just cameos, those include Stiffler’s mum, Nadia and Vicky (Tara Reid). Aside from Stiffler’s mum none of the others really much but take up screen time.
The film does have a subtlety and maturity that the others don’t have, and all of the characters come to a satisfying conclusion as the reunion takes place and the final scene follows the end credits, particularly in Stiffler’s case.
But I do hope this will be the last one, with the American box office numbers nowhere near the previous three films this will be more than likely. Perhaps the film would have better served if it had been released on the tenth anniversary of the first film in 2009 instead of 2012.
But American Reunion is still a decent film worth seeing that will divide fans and bring nothing new to newcomers, my message to them, go back to the beginning where it all started.
3/5
The Avengers Assemble- Review
Probably the best comic book adaption I have ever seen
The Avengers surpassed all my expectations, in pretty much every way. When the idea was first announced I didn’t think it would work, I thought there would be too many superheroes for it not to be a mess, but I’ve been proved wrong.
With The Hulk, Iron Man, Thor, and Captain America all rolled into one team, there is plenty of action and carnage to go down well with your popcorn.
The film leads off from where Thor ended, when a powerful energy called Tesseract is unleashed and creates a portal in Space; Loki manages to break through and plans to send an army to destroy Earth. It is from here that director of S.H.I.E.L.D Nick Fury (Samuel Jackson) assembles ‘The Avengers’ initiative.
The story soon brings all of the team together reasonably soon into the film. What works well is the fact that the chemistry between the characters is very good, while part of a team you really feel as though each have their own individual role and story within the main plot.
For me the star of the show was Robert Downey Jr as Iron Man, as well as taking part in the best action scenes he brings a level of humour and comic relief into the film that breaks up the pace between the different sections of action and dialogue.
The film is also helped with a very impressive and menacing villain, the remorseless Loki strays away from being camp or too complex of a character not to understand, his motives and purpose are clear.
The effects are impressive and mind blowing; it’s hard to imagine anything ever bettering it. The 3D whilst not the best that I have seen does its job without really hindering or greatly improving my experience if I had not done so.
At 2hours and 23 minutes the film is long but thanks to the good pacing and build up to the conclusion I felt involved in every scene, and not once did I want the end credits appear.
In conclusion the film is without doubt the best I’ve seen in 2012 so far, with probably the best finale that I have ever seen on screen, and with a great collection of one liners to offer, The Avengers is worth every penny of your money and defines must see!
4.5/5
The Avengers surpassed all my expectations, in pretty much every way. When the idea was first announced I didn’t think it would work, I thought there would be too many superheroes for it not to be a mess, but I’ve been proved wrong.
With The Hulk, Iron Man, Thor, and Captain America all rolled into one team, there is plenty of action and carnage to go down well with your popcorn.
The film leads off from where Thor ended, when a powerful energy called Tesseract is unleashed and creates a portal in Space; Loki manages to break through and plans to send an army to destroy Earth. It is from here that director of S.H.I.E.L.D Nick Fury (Samuel Jackson) assembles ‘The Avengers’ initiative.
The story soon brings all of the team together reasonably soon into the film. What works well is the fact that the chemistry between the characters is very good, while part of a team you really feel as though each have their own individual role and story within the main plot.
For me the star of the show was Robert Downey Jr as Iron Man, as well as taking part in the best action scenes he brings a level of humour and comic relief into the film that breaks up the pace between the different sections of action and dialogue.
The film is also helped with a very impressive and menacing villain, the remorseless Loki strays away from being camp or too complex of a character not to understand, his motives and purpose are clear.
The effects are impressive and mind blowing; it’s hard to imagine anything ever bettering it. The 3D whilst not the best that I have seen does its job without really hindering or greatly improving my experience if I had not done so.
At 2hours and 23 minutes the film is long but thanks to the good pacing and build up to the conclusion I felt involved in every scene, and not once did I want the end credits appear.
In conclusion the film is without doubt the best I’ve seen in 2012 so far, with probably the best finale that I have ever seen on screen, and with a great collection of one liners to offer, The Avengers is worth every penny of your money and defines must see!
4.5/5
The Cabin in the Woods- Review
A film of two halves, that tries too much and ends up being hard up to appreciate it.It’s not often that horror films cross over successfully with other genres, its also even rarer when the film doesn’t take itself too seriously. Ones that come to mind are Shaun of the dead, and to a lesser degree Drag me to Hell.
Cabin in the Woods is one such film, it takes all of the generics of a horror film and half spoofs it, this is particularly true in the first half of the film which I didn’t enjoy.
As with many horror films, the plot is centred on a group of teenagers, the two good looking male leads Curt (Chris Hemsworth) and Holden (Jesses Williams), we have the innocent female lead (Kristen Connolly), the blonde bombshell Jules (Anna Huchison), and lastly the dopey and comic relief Marty (Fran Kranz).
As soon as the film starts it’s not long before they set off on a road trip to a cabin that a relative of one of the characters owns.
From their arrival at the cabin strange things begin to happen to their surroundings; unbeknownst to the characters is that they are taking part in a reality TV game. As things begin to go wrong the film replays old filler moments from classic horror films (zombies rising out from the ground), but because the film doesn’t take itself seriously none of it gives off any reaction, which is essential for horror films to succeed.
Another problem is that whilst the film doesn’t take itself seriously it doesn’t intend to be a comedy either, which meant that I cared very little for the characters. Until the last twenty minutes of the film much of its narrative is very predictable- same scene different film.
However it is in the last twenty minutes of the film that it really does come alive. The twists and plot devices are both surprising and original, as well as the appearance of the most blood drenched scene I have ever seen, and then throw in the fact that there is a cameo by Sigourney Weaver, for a moment you realise why you paid for a ticket in the first place.
But the conclusion doesn’t save the film from being any more than decent, for those who love horror films for what they should be will struggle to appreciate this, while those who don’t will think more highly of it.
A good popcorn flick but nothing more
3/5
Resident Evil Revelations- Review
A delighful entry into the survivor horror franchise, that will please old and new fans, only hampered by a few flaws that stop it from being truly great.
After the release of Resident Evil 5 many fans were left a little underwhelmed after so much of the hype and the fact that the game followed on from the awe inspiring and game changing Resident Evil 4. By no means was 5 a bad game, it was a very good and enjoyable game, but not a very good Resident Evil game. With Revelations Capcom have decided to go back to the drawing board and bring together the best elements of the franchise.
Revelations sees the return of Jill Valentine as the main playable character along with a few supporting characters. The game starts off with Jill along with her partner Parker investigating the disappearance of fellow BSAA (Bioterrorism Security Assessment Alliance agent Chris Redfield, this leads to the Queen Zenobia (a larger cruise ship).
I won’t go too far into the details of the story, but from here the horror begins as the player quickly encounters mutated enemies due to the T-Abyss virus. The game goes back to the franchise’s roots as the surroundings are very dark and constrained, without being linear. The hallways are dark and the texture effects of the torch you carry makes for a very eerie game, for the first time in a while a Resident Evil game feels like a scary survival horror rather than a action packed gorefest.
Aside from the exploring, the gameplay runs very much like a point and click shooting game, when you aim at an enemies the camera draws just behind your weapon, you can’t move whilst you’re aiming but it works because it means that there is always a sense of urgency, the variety of Arsenal that you can get at your disposal is impressive, so it’s always nice to see them put to use.
But a new and very welcoming addition to the game is the Genesis, the Genesis is a type of scanning device which you use to find items in your surrounding (as well as dead enemies you have killed). The device has a scanning metre and as soon as you reach 100% you get a free green herb. It adds something fresh to the franchise that hasn’t really been done before, it gives the player more interactivity to the games environment, it works because it doesn’t hinder the players experience but adds to it.
The same can be said for the underwater scenes, yes you heard it, there are times in the game where you get to swim underwater. The idea is certainly daring but it works, and because they occur at the end of the game they really add to the tension, I won’t spoil it for you.
There are few puzzles in the game and the ones that you come across are hardly going to tax your intelligence for too long, they consist of the usual Resident Evil putting things in the right slots (electronic wirings in this case). The item box returns, but only to stock and update up your weapons (throughout the game are custom parts that you can discover with your Genesis).
The graphics are beautiful and really show what the 3DS is capable of, and I found no fault with the cutscenes and voice overs, by Resident Evil standards they are very impressive. The final boss battle is a perfect illustration of this, and one of the best crafted I have ever seen in a videogame, you really do feel like you’re taking part in a movie scene, it is absolutely exhilarating.
Not all is perfect with the game however, the enemies whilst different and fresh at first soon get very dull, and there is quite simply a lack of variety in them, it seems as though the developers concentrated on the rest of the game and then left them to the last minute. In my opinion the game would have been best served if they reverted back to the original zombies that we faced in the early games of the series, the loactions and atmosphere would have been perfect for it.
For a game that is atmosphericly scary and challenging the healing system is far too simplistic, there are only green herbs, you can’t mix them with anything and they heal you completely as soon as you use them. The AI of your partner throughout the game is useless and do very little (other than stunning them their shots have no affect on enemies). And because the game is split into episodes you get a chance to play as other characters in their seperate parts in the story, including Chris and Jessica, whilst a good idea that adds to the game they came across as far too short to really appreciate.
The length is just about right, I completed it in just over 9 hours and it was worth every moment, you can then complete it on new harder difficulties with the same equipment from the previous game. Then there is the Raid mode, similar to the Mercenaries in previous games but mission based.
In conclusion the game adds together the best of the old and current elements of the franchise, it was good to play as Jill once again. With a few tweaks and a better focus on the enemies it would have been my 3rd favourite of the series behind 2 and 4, but now it will have to sit in 4th behind the 2002 Gamecube remake and level with Code Veronica.
8/10- Every 3DS owner should own this game
After the release of Resident Evil 5 many fans were left a little underwhelmed after so much of the hype and the fact that the game followed on from the awe inspiring and game changing Resident Evil 4. By no means was 5 a bad game, it was a very good and enjoyable game, but not a very good Resident Evil game. With Revelations Capcom have decided to go back to the drawing board and bring together the best elements of the franchise.Revelations sees the return of Jill Valentine as the main playable character along with a few supporting characters. The game starts off with Jill along with her partner Parker investigating the disappearance of fellow BSAA (Bioterrorism Security Assessment Alliance agent Chris Redfield, this leads to the Queen Zenobia (a larger cruise ship).
I won’t go too far into the details of the story, but from here the horror begins as the player quickly encounters mutated enemies due to the T-Abyss virus. The game goes back to the franchise’s roots as the surroundings are very dark and constrained, without being linear. The hallways are dark and the texture effects of the torch you carry makes for a very eerie game, for the first time in a while a Resident Evil game feels like a scary survival horror rather than a action packed gorefest.
Aside from the exploring, the gameplay runs very much like a point and click shooting game, when you aim at an enemies the camera draws just behind your weapon, you can’t move whilst you’re aiming but it works because it means that there is always a sense of urgency, the variety of Arsenal that you can get at your disposal is impressive, so it’s always nice to see them put to use.
But a new and very welcoming addition to the game is the Genesis, the Genesis is a type of scanning device which you use to find items in your surrounding (as well as dead enemies you have killed). The device has a scanning metre and as soon as you reach 100% you get a free green herb. It adds something fresh to the franchise that hasn’t really been done before, it gives the player more interactivity to the games environment, it works because it doesn’t hinder the players experience but adds to it.
The same can be said for the underwater scenes, yes you heard it, there are times in the game where you get to swim underwater. The idea is certainly daring but it works, and because they occur at the end of the game they really add to the tension, I won’t spoil it for you.
There are few puzzles in the game and the ones that you come across are hardly going to tax your intelligence for too long, they consist of the usual Resident Evil putting things in the right slots (electronic wirings in this case). The item box returns, but only to stock and update up your weapons (throughout the game are custom parts that you can discover with your Genesis).
The graphics are beautiful and really show what the 3DS is capable of, and I found no fault with the cutscenes and voice overs, by Resident Evil standards they are very impressive. The final boss battle is a perfect illustration of this, and one of the best crafted I have ever seen in a videogame, you really do feel like you’re taking part in a movie scene, it is absolutely exhilarating.
Not all is perfect with the game however, the enemies whilst different and fresh at first soon get very dull, and there is quite simply a lack of variety in them, it seems as though the developers concentrated on the rest of the game and then left them to the last minute. In my opinion the game would have been best served if they reverted back to the original zombies that we faced in the early games of the series, the loactions and atmosphere would have been perfect for it.
For a game that is atmosphericly scary and challenging the healing system is far too simplistic, there are only green herbs, you can’t mix them with anything and they heal you completely as soon as you use them. The AI of your partner throughout the game is useless and do very little (other than stunning them their shots have no affect on enemies). And because the game is split into episodes you get a chance to play as other characters in their seperate parts in the story, including Chris and Jessica, whilst a good idea that adds to the game they came across as far too short to really appreciate.
The length is just about right, I completed it in just over 9 hours and it was worth every moment, you can then complete it on new harder difficulties with the same equipment from the previous game. Then there is the Raid mode, similar to the Mercenaries in previous games but mission based.
In conclusion the game adds together the best of the old and current elements of the franchise, it was good to play as Jill once again. With a few tweaks and a better focus on the enemies it would have been my 3rd favourite of the series behind 2 and 4, but now it will have to sit in 4th behind the 2002 Gamecube remake and level with Code Veronica.
8/10- Every 3DS owner should own this game
The Hunger Games- Review
A moving and powerful film mired by a few flaws that prevent it from being masterful.Plot synopsolis-Set in a future where the Capitol selects a boy and girl from the twelve districts to fight to the death on live television, Katniss Everdeen volunteers to take her younger sister’s place for the latest match.
The Hunger Games is based on a novel by Suzanne Collins, the first in a trilogy. After it’s recent box office numbers there will no doubt be more films to come. The story takes place in Panem, which is the old continent of North America, which has been devestate by an apocolyptic event.
Within Panem are twelve districts, from each district a lottery takes where a boy and a girl are selected to take part in a violent reality TV show, which takes place in a city called Capitol.
From the outset The Hunger games should not be anymore than a teen version of ‘The Running Man’ or ‘The Battle Royale’. The concepts of a gladiator gameshow have been done numerous times before. But with it’s subtle but obvious social references to celebrity culture, human violence, identity and poverty, The Hunger Games manages to be a very enjoyable without being patronising and at times very moving film.
The heroines are Katnis Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) and Peeta Mellark (Josh Hutcherson), both characters have been cast perfectly. Jemmifer Lawrence plays the strong willed but remorceful Katnis with perfection, from the moment she volunteers to take her sister’s place in the games to the moment they begin. With Woody Harrelson supplying the central supporting role as Haymitch Abernathy, the casting is one of the films strengths.
On arrival at Capitol we witness an extravagence of pretensciousness, wealth and delusion, the people are dressed like fashion show props. Although perhaps over done the imagery is powerful, the city is very colourful and beaming with life compared to the districts that surround it, and where the contestants have been taken from.
As the film leads up to the games the contestants go through a series of training excercies, it’s not hard to see the similarities with current talent shows that infest our television, the film portrays them as nothing but commodities as they lavish on the most wonderful feasts that are given to them, and the trappings of celebrity. The film manages to show the irony in which the contestants improve their hunting skills that they will eventually use against one another, whilst for the most part they appear to be friendly and absent minded about the causes that they will have to eventually inflict on one another.
In the last third of the film when the games do eventually begin I actually felt a little underwhelmed, with so much build up the scenes seemed to drag on, much of the intriegue beforehand seems to be lost with moments of nothingness, empty minutes and emotional piffle that doesn’t always hit the mark.
But there are numerous scenes that are brutal, not in what we see but the context under the circumstances that they occur. One of the best scenes is involves a wasps nest, which I won’t go into too much detail, because I don’t want to spoit for you. There has been some controversy over whether the rating should have been a 15 and not a 12A, I disagree, while some scenes display mild violence they are not explicit.
As someone who has lived in the curent bubble of reality TV and celebrity that has infected our society (and of which I find entirely repugnant), it was good to see its delusion and falousy mocked and satirised. With strong perfomances all round, a powerful message and moments of screen brilliance. The Hunger Games is a very entertaining film well worth your time and money.
4/5
John Carter- Review
A dull, overlong fantasy that had very little redeeming things to say about it.

Never in my life have I wanted a film to end so desperately as I did with John Carter. What looked like a very interesting film in it’s trailer turned out to be one of the most disappointing films I’ve seen for quite some time.
The film is based on a Princess of Mars, which was written by Edgar Rice Burroughs. I confess that I have never read the book so I do not know how close it is to the source material, but it has been the bases of inspiration for such people as George Lucas and Michael Crichton, amongst others.
The plot revolves around John Carter (Taylor Kitsch) a former American civil war Confederate Army captain, at one early stage in the film he is transported to Mars (or Barsoom as the natives call it) by a mysterious medallion. From there he is involved in a plot to save a princess and a battle of civilizations.
On landing on Mars Carter realises that he has the ability to Jump very high because of the difference in gravity between Earth and Mars, in other words he is a super human being. When he first realises this ability, I actually began to have high hopes for the film because it is perfectly captured but in the end the idea gets overblown and over done.
Which is the biggest problem with the film, everything is overblown, of course films can get away with this (a quick example are the first two ‘Mummy’ films), but the trouble with John Carter is that none of it is done in a remotely interesting or fun way, from the action scenes to the poor dialogue, and the rather annoying character of the main love interest Princess Darja Thoris (Lynn Collins). Who for all intents and purpose she is nothing but eye candy from the first scene to her last.
For a film with a 250 million dollar budget the special effects were drab and never awe inspiring, perhaps they had been spent on the green 12 foot species Thark, who whilst impressive looking display all the characteristics and stereotypes of what Hollywood considers barbarian races.
The film is also far too long, about about half and hour I would say, the length of the film isn’t helped by the incoherent and rather confusing narrative of the film as it jumps from one plot device to the next. By the time the film ran into the last part of it’s running time I could sense the impatience in the audience, as well as my own feelings that everyone just wanted the film to come to it’s conclusion as soon as possible.
In the end John Carter felt like an over long, over budgetted episode of a Sci-Fi TV show. But without any of the thrills and heart. So unless you’re a die hard film fan or science fiction fan, avoid at all costs and rent it on a boring Sunday night when it comes out on DVD.
2/5

Never in my life have I wanted a film to end so desperately as I did with John Carter. What looked like a very interesting film in it’s trailer turned out to be one of the most disappointing films I’ve seen for quite some time.
The film is based on a Princess of Mars, which was written by Edgar Rice Burroughs. I confess that I have never read the book so I do not know how close it is to the source material, but it has been the bases of inspiration for such people as George Lucas and Michael Crichton, amongst others.
The plot revolves around John Carter (Taylor Kitsch) a former American civil war Confederate Army captain, at one early stage in the film he is transported to Mars (or Barsoom as the natives call it) by a mysterious medallion. From there he is involved in a plot to save a princess and a battle of civilizations.
On landing on Mars Carter realises that he has the ability to Jump very high because of the difference in gravity between Earth and Mars, in other words he is a super human being. When he first realises this ability, I actually began to have high hopes for the film because it is perfectly captured but in the end the idea gets overblown and over done.
Which is the biggest problem with the film, everything is overblown, of course films can get away with this (a quick example are the first two ‘Mummy’ films), but the trouble with John Carter is that none of it is done in a remotely interesting or fun way, from the action scenes to the poor dialogue, and the rather annoying character of the main love interest Princess Darja Thoris (Lynn Collins). Who for all intents and purpose she is nothing but eye candy from the first scene to her last.
For a film with a 250 million dollar budget the special effects were drab and never awe inspiring, perhaps they had been spent on the green 12 foot species Thark, who whilst impressive looking display all the characteristics and stereotypes of what Hollywood considers barbarian races.
The film is also far too long, about about half and hour I would say, the length of the film isn’t helped by the incoherent and rather confusing narrative of the film as it jumps from one plot device to the next. By the time the film ran into the last part of it’s running time I could sense the impatience in the audience, as well as my own feelings that everyone just wanted the film to come to it’s conclusion as soon as possible.
In the end John Carter felt like an over long, over budgetted episode of a Sci-Fi TV show. But without any of the thrills and heart. So unless you’re a die hard film fan or science fiction fan, avoid at all costs and rent it on a boring Sunday night when it comes out on DVD.
2/5
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