I have only held a gun once, and don't want to hold one again

I have only just managed to get time to write about the subject of guns, in light of the recent Sandy Hook massacre. As so many other commentators have already said about the tragedy of the event, it embodies everything that human wickedness and evil are capable of, and how fragile the human mind really is.The last moments of those (especially the young infants) that were killed is unbearable to even think about, the birthdays and weddings that were taken away from their futures is the cruelest any human can conflict on another. And I could never imagine what it must feel like for those who have cruelly lost loved ones in such a barbaric manner.

No doubt there will now be a debate about gun control laws in America, as Obama has already suggested, and quite rightly so. The thought of be able to buy armed fire arms and ammunition so easily (exposed so greatly by Michael Moore in 'Bowling for Columbine') in supermarkets really is hard to comprehend for me. Since the story broke numerous statistics have been thrown around, either way I can only come to the conclusion that there are far too many gun owners in America.

Will gun laws make any difference? I think in the long run it probably would. But no amount of gun laws will eradicate the horrific actions of our fellow man to commit the most heinous of crimes. The underlying issue is far more complex. And with the American culture so indebted to the second amendment and it's constitution, as well as American nature to be antagonistic towards any intrusion of the state, I'm not sure if anything will eventually change. There is also the question of mental health, which seems to be prevalent in many of the perpetrators of these crimes.

But to leave the tragic event behind, I will talk about my own experience of firing (numerous kinds) of guns. I have family in Texas and I went there for the first time in October 09. While there, on my own insistence I was able to use the guns that were privately owned by those who I was staying with. The firearms were a Glock 9 pistol, and an old assault rifle, our targeting practice were empty plastic bottles and a wooden board.

What was most surprising and shocking, was that each of the gun's felt much heavier in my hands than I expected. It felt peculiarly frightening holding something which gave me the power to hurt someone let alone kill them. I still remember the thunderous bang that gave way the first time I pulled the trigger of the Glock 9, and then there was the violent jolt in my arms and shoulders, the impact was certainly an experience I will never forget. With each passing shot I became more reluctant to pull the trigger, and did so only through curiosity and to save face.

In total I must have fired around ten shots with both guns included. But not long after the experience, it all left me cold and fearful of guns in general. Heaven forbid, unless it was a life and death situation I would never want to touch another gun again.